Time for Tea

It is OK to sigh, or scream, and/or cry. The situation many of us find ourselves in – juggling competing priorities on an hourly basis interrupted by fear, gratitude and grief is not what we are used to. It is incredibly hard, unreasonable and next to impossible. But, it is what we are all experiencing and it is the way of our lives presently. To deny what we are experiencing can make matters worse. It ends up making us feel as if we are incapable of handling crisis moments or that how we are doing it does not measure up to some imaginary ruler. Pretending like we are holding it all together does not honor the struggle we each are in – no matter what it looks like. So, now is the time to feel it all. As Rumi reminds us, invite these feelings in, welcoming them as if they were a friend. The more we open to the feeling of overwhelm, the less overwhelmed we feel. The more we make space for the meltdown our child is having, the more compassion we feel for ourselves as we are melting down inside. And, the more we welcome the gratitude we have for health and our family connections, the more deeply we feel these positive feelings, making the memory of them closer.

Imagine that you are inviting these feelings for tea. If you aren’t a tea drinker, not a problem. (We all are drinking something these days!) Just imagine that you are inviting them in for whatever you may have to drink – something that you will savor. Then, take the time to feel whatever it is you are experiencing.  If you’re angry, you can feel the anger - have compassion for yourself for the strain you are under that may result in anger. All feelings are truly welcome, even when it seems like they shouldn’t be. During this time, ride the roller coaster of all of the emotions, taking very good care of yourself. This will allow you to be able to take very good care of your children when they are riding the roller coaster. In case you are unfamiliar with The Guest House, here it is. 

The Guest House by Rumi

This being human is a guest house. 

Every morning a new arrival.

A joy, a depression, a meanness,

some momentary awareness comes

as an unexpected visitor.

 Welcome and entertain them all!

Even if they’re a crowd of sorrows,

who violently sweet your house

empty of its furniture, 

still, treat each guest honorably.

He may be clearing you out

for some new delight.

The dark thought, the shame, the malice,

meet them at the door laughing, 

and invite them in.

 Be grateful for whoever comes,

because each has been sent

as a guide from beyond.