On your mark, get set, go: Youth-appropriate goal-setting strategies

As adults, we often greet the new year with big plans for achieving goals and resolutions. And, even if we are not ultimately successful in achieving these goals, the goal-setting process itself can be beneficial to help us prioritize time and resources. But what level of goal-setting is appropriate for kids, especially in an era of increasing academic and athletic competition with peers? This is a question that many of our clients ask not only when January rolls around, but also throughout the year. 

Setting goals can be beneficial for children, but the approach should be age-appropriate and tailored to each child’s developmental stage. While there's no definitive age that's "too young" to introduce goal-setting concepts, experts generally agree that children can start engaging in simple goal-setting activities around age five or six. 

The benefits to children of goal-setting will not surprise you because they are quite similar to the benefits experienced by adults: increased motivation, a sense of purpose, sharpening responsibility and time management skills, building self-confidence, and improving problem-solving and organizational skills.

Before you jump into goal-setting with your child, take a moment to review a few tips for creating goals for kids depending on their ages.

Preschoolers

Around age four or five, children begin to understand basic cause-and-effect relationships. Goal setting should be simple and short-term, focused on immediate achievements, and guided by parents or caregivers. When you think of setting goals at this stage, think about things like a child learning to tie shoes or button up a coat.  

Elementary school 

Children between the ages of six and 11 can start setting more complex goals, and they’ll be able to understand the concepts of goals that are specific, measurable, achievable, relevant, and time-bound (“SMART” goals). For example, a child can set a goal to make the bed every day before leaving for school.

Adolescents and teens

By the age of 12, children can learn to set longer-term goals, such as improving their grade in a class, making the basketball team, or reading three books in a month. The key during this phase is to encourage more independence in goal selection with each advancing year, along with increasing the child’s own planning for action steps and identifying milestones.

If you’ve decided that helping your child set goals would be beneficial to the child’s growth, keep a few pointers in mind:

–Involve your child in the process of setting the goals and keeping the reason for the goal top of mind.

–Create goals that are specific and measurable, not vague; clarity is critical.

–Celebrate progress and achievements, no matter how small.

–Reinforce practice as a way to make progress, but not perfection

–When setbacks occur, as they surely will, help your child learn, and consider adjusting the goal if the original target proves unrealistic.

–Model your own goal-setting behavior, including dealing with successes and setbacks.

Remember, a little goal setting goes a long way! Focus on personal growth, learning, and building confidence rather than achieving rigid objectives. As children develop, their goal-setting skills can become more complex and self-directed, preparing them for future success.